CARROT CAKE REVIEW No 17 ~ I'm Not Saying Fuck Off To Gluten Free, OK

 Hunstanton, West Norfolk.


















This Cafe overlooks the main green that slopes down towards the promenade, where everything that Hunstanton can throw at you as a childish diversion resides. The cafe's interior, sits uncomfortably between spacious and sparse. I'd like to say it was a symphony in grey, but that would require much more effort than the uniform pale grey tone here can make. Bare of much to ornament its walls without the satisfaction of achieving minimalism, it is, in short, characterless - with very sticky tabletops.

It was a bit late in the day for a Flat White so I toned down the caffeine to a Latte. Not that I needed to let such cosmopolitan worries about caffeine intake get the better of me. The Latte came in a mug, yes, a generic white ceramic mug straight from the local cash and carry. The contents looked disconcertingly like used dishwater. Beneath its feeble frothy surface lay what was in fact just an ordinary milky cup of coffee. Inoffensive were it not for its blandness. Thank god I didn't order a Flat White or my disappointment level would have gone much further than peeved.

And so, to the Carrot Cake. Oh, how I wish I could really let go and explode into rhapsodic language, about how the cake turned my impressions around, that any place which could serve such a superlative carrot cake could be forgiven a minor slip with the quality of the coffee. But, alas, it was not to be so - it was more than slightly dry for starters. Its texture actually wasn't that bad, so there might be a slight possibility a carrot was once waved in its vicinity. However, the more it stayed tumbling up and down around the region of my taste buds I could sense something else was awry on an ingredient level.

It was Hubby who put his finger on it. Not only was this cake Gluten Free, without informing you it was, the flavouring was the mixed spice equivalent of a cheap men's after shave. I've nothing against cakes being gluten free so long as they steer clear of me and I of them. But there is a growing tendency to assume there's no difference between a Gluten Inclusive and a Gluten Free version, which is just not true. A Gluten Free Carrot Cake will always be for me a Fake Carrot Cake. There are currently  increasing  numbers  of, undoubtedly well meaning ,cafes and cake shops who serve you nothing but the buggers.

Where does this leave those of us with a robust digestive system? Are we forced forever into an inclusive world where Carrot Cakes are pale imitations of the traditional? If I were not so liberal minded  and fearful of triggering the sensitivities of social media, I'd say fuck off to Gluten Free. So, just to be clear I haven't actually said that,OK, I'm  declining to endorse the content of my private internal unvocalised vitriol online.

All this was disguised, or do I mean relieved, by the sweetness of its frosting. Boy was the sucrose high. Sugar hit coming up!

CARROT CAKE SCORE  2/8


 



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

CARROT CAKE RECIPE No 1 ~ Neal's Yard Wholefood Cookbook

Image
Carrot Cake Recipe ~ from Neal's Yard Wholefood Cook Book, Rachel Haigh, Way back in April the impetus for making this cake was to celebrate Hubby's birthday. This isn't by any means my first cake, but it was my debut carrot cake recipe. I thought that I'd broaden my search for the perfect carrot cake, by trying out different recipes. When I worked in Central London, I used to buy this carrot cake from Neal's Yard Bakery, sadly no more, and remember it as being rather good. I picked their wholefood cookbook up some years later in a remainder outlet, and some of its recipes are well established favourites. This first attempt at the recipe was OK, but wasn't quite the archetypal carrot cake I remember it being. Rather than do a single cake, I split the mix into two sandwich tins. I had to adjust the baking time, but not by quite enough, so the cake got slightly over cooked, and hence a tad dry. The recipe has sultanas and walnuts in it, ...
Read more

CARROT CAKE REVIEW No 8 ~ A Nice Performance

Image
The Old Theatre Deli, Southwell, Nottinghamshire. I know this is not on the North Norfolk coast, but its been quite a while since we've found a new cafe we haven't already visited, let alone a carrot cake. Whilst in Nottinghamshire on a Pre-Christmas family visit we spent a delightful half a day in Southwell. We took in the Minister and found an excellent Deli/Cafe, with a rather passable carrot cake. The cake was looking good from its external features, a healthy orangey brown tan with a substantail amount of filling and topping. Once you took a bite into it, the cake had that distinctly carroty texture to it, flavoured strongly with carrot too, and a decent enough amount of walnuts to be noticible on the palate. I think it had just mixed spices as additional flavouring, I couldn't detect anything else, but what there was was sufficient to complement rather than drown. Both the filling and topping were a cream cheese, so glory halleluyah ! There was a...
Read more

CARROT CAKE REVIEW No 2 - Sponge Cake does not a Carrot Cake make

Image
Sheringham, Norfolk, The cake on the plate looked enormous, declaring itself a value for money slice of cake loud and clear. You could even see the gratings of carrot creating an orange speckled effect. The first taste of the cake was that it was rather fluffy and, I have to say, excessive in the lightness of its texture. I don't know about you, but for me, one of the characteristics of a really good carrot cake is that because of its primary ingredient, ie. the carrot, it  tends to be a dense and weightier cake than most other species. When you envisage a carrot cake, fluffy, never comes to mind. I came to the conclusion that this cake was, in its very essence, made from a sponge mix with some large gratings of carrot thrown in for local colour. So, it carries its carrot credentials a bit weakly. That said, it still had some carrot taste to it, plus a mild amount of mixed spice. The overall appearance and taste did teeter towards bland, which is a shame. Had ...
Read more